Lemons and Lemonade

Hullo all! Thank you for your warm wishes and sorry to have had to pop off without much notice last week. I am safe and cozy at home again and all too glad to have my books and puppies within easy reach. I returned home on Saturday evening and Wasabi has been at my side ever since. Gerrard would very much like to be but he gets the wiggles so bad that it is impossible for him to sit still for more than a few moments. He brings me lots of toys though.

I woke up the Friday before last and quickly discovered that I was not going to be going to work that morning. A chat with The Good Doctor and it was off to the hospital for tests and lots of lovely pharmaceuticals. Three cheers for pharmaceuticals! It is a rather convoluted story involving changing doctors (yay!), waiting for some very fancy researchers to perform some very fancy tests, but the short version is, whilst waiting, there was some tumor growth, subsequent discomfort, which led to chemo and all the normal protocol for dealing with such things. All that being said, I feel fine. It would be very difficult for me not to feel fine given the stuff I’m taking! :) I’m home and happy, under the care of an excellent physician, we have a plan and that is all I really care about.

Actually, this hospital stay had a lot of positive outcomes. I was at a better, nicer, (Read: I’m never going back to that other awful place again) hospital and under the care of some of the kindest people one could imagine. My previous hospital visits had resulted in a major psychological rift between me and the nursing profession. The mere mention of the word ‘nurse’ would dredge up anxiety to the point that I suffered nightmares. I wish I were joking but, for once, I’m being dread serious. This time was different. This time I had a bright, cheery room with a lovely view and I honestly believe that the nurses cared for me as well as they would have their own child. There were days that I honestly felt a bit spoiled.

And I got yet another demonstration of how fabulous my friends and family are. They never cease to amaze me with their generosity and compassion. Officer B and Daddy, always on the front line, holding my hand through the worst of it and moving heaven and earth to get me what I need – always steady and calm, despite their own fears. I’d be so lost without them. Liz, her sister Rebecca, and other lady friends arranged it so that someone stayed with me every night. It was such a comfort to have them there and I know I slept easier because of it. My poor sister had to manage another family crisis all by herself and did so with her usual quiet grace (You make me proud, kiddo!). And so many others who brought me books, and candy, and crosswords, and prayers, and good conversation, and maybe even a little work (against their better judgment) to keep my brain from atrophying. I could go on and on with hundreds of examples of the kindnesses shown me. No matter how you slice it, I am a very lucky and very loved girl!